Of tears and tissues and tchah!

They cannot watch a woman cry. They feel helpless and upset and oh so sad. To watch a girl cry is the worst punishment. Correction: they cannot handle it. So much so, that some women go to the extent of fake crying (pinching their palms, biting the inside of their cheek, chopping onions, thinking about god-knows-whaa?! to cry) to get their way. I mean, sure, if the man you’re with is such an idiot, then please go ahead, get those tissues out and make him pay for all that stupidity!

So, these boys/men, the other sex. They cannot see a woman’s tears. Bollocks. Its the phlegm they cannot deal with. Its the amount of concentration required to understand what a person who is crying and blubbering is saying that they cannot muster. Its even the unlimited supply of tissue that they cannot provide. Useless.

“I cannot see a woman cry”! Really? Then why are women who don’t shed tears by default ”one of the guys”? Why are women who don’t cry while breaking up with you some sort of witches?! And why, my dear boy, do they make you whimper? Why is it that when they are mean and bitchy and picky that you decide to shed your tears? All that matters is that they weeped when you were inattentive and non-committal and forgetful (on her birthday!). So, you try to break up with her on your “1 year anniversary” and expect her to understand. But if she tells you, it’s not working out, you start the water-works!

I can note down a gazillion examples of you crying. You all cry, a lot of the times, and I have proof! I have a lot of stories from a lot of women. But that’s note the point. The point is, if I hear you say “Boys don’t cry” unless you are referring to Hillary Swank’s award winning performance, or say, “I can’t deal with girls crying…” then I will kick you in the shin. I will render you shin-less!

Breaking news to all supposed macho jocks. Everyone cries. EVERYONE. And it is okay. I’d prefer if you don’t, but it’s cool. It’s okay. It’s fine. Go ahead, vent, achieve catharsis, get over it by shedding a few tears. I can help. I can make you weep. Really weep! Like a kid whose cotton candy was snatched away by a scary clown at a circus. So, think, really think, before you utter a sentence with the word cry in it! It better not have girl in it.

Tchah!